Monday, August 20, 2018

Executive Functioning: A Guide for Parents and Caregivers

Kristen Sudnik


There are many definitions of executive function. My purpose is to give you a definition that is easy to grasp, relate to and remember. Basically, executive functioning is the ability to execute tasks. While that may sound simple, it actually involves planning, prioritizing, setting goals, initiating tasks, following through with those tasks, sustaining attention, organizing, being flexible, using working memory, being able to reflect on our own thinking and behavior, inhibit behavior, and regulate our emotions. It’s a lot, right? 

Think about your morning routine. When your alarm goes off, you immediately have to plan, prioritize, reflect and self-regulate: “Do I have time to press snooze? What time do I have to be out of the house? What do I need to do? Okay, I definitely do not have time to press snooze.” You get out of bed, and the planning and task initiation continue: you hop in the shower and get dressed. Next, you have to use some inhibition- there are donuts on the counter, but you just started a new diet. You pass them by, and grab a banana instead. Next, organization and time management come into play: you grab your bag and keys, which you always place by the door the night before so you won’t forget anything, check your watch, and head out on time. 

Now let’s compare that to a student who struggles with executive functioning. (Every child has their own strengths and opportunities for growth, so this is purely to illustrate possible differences.) They wake up late because they forgot to set their alarm the night before. When they do get out of bed, they decide to check Facebook, and end up getting distracted for fifteen minutes. They glance at the clock and realize that they need to hurry up. They hop in the shower, and once out, get frustrated because they can’t find the sweater they wanted to wear that day. After choosing something else from the pile of clothes in the corner, they walk towards the kitchen and see the donuts. They eat one and take the other to go. They start to look for their bag, and realize that they forgot to finish their math assignment last night. As their mom is nagging them to get out the door, they become frustrated and yell at her to leave them alone. They have trouble finding their keys, and are so relieved to find them, that they rush out of the door, leaving their lunch and math book behind. Sound familiar? There is a reason for all of this, and there are approaches we can use to help! It starts with understanding a little bit about the brain. The following is a very simplistic interpretation of the incredibly complex human brain: 



The main part of our brain that is responsible for executive functioning is the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex is our reasoning center. It is responsible for logical decision making. It is also the part of our brain that gets things done. You can think of it as the air traffic controller, or the “boss” of the brain. The prefrontal cortex does not fully develop until around 25 years of age- because of this, it is also helpful to understand a little bit about the amygdyla.

The amygdyla is a small, almond shaped piece of the brain that is part of the limbic system. You can think of the amygdyla as our emotional center. Our limbic system is where fight, flight or freeze come into play. The limbic system is evolutionarily speaking, one of the oldest parts of our brain, and it develops more quickly than the prefrontal cortex. This is useful to know when we think about adolescent brains and behavior. We may think, “The mood swings of my child must be due to hormones”, or even more likely, “What were they thinking?!” Studies have shown that when making decisions or solving problems, the brains of younger children and adolescents more heavily rely on the amygdyla, or emotional center as the prefrontal cortex is still developing. This reveals the importance of teaching emotional regulation to our children. 

Want to know more about executive functioning and the brain? Check out this article about a recent  large scale brain imaging study that compared the brains of children, adolescents and adults with ADHD to those without.


Executive Functions Broken Down 
Executive functions are defined differently by various experts, but the following is a comprehensive list from Smart but Scattered by Peg Dawson and Richard Guare of what they entail:  
-Response Inhibition: Simply stated, this is the ability to think before you act. An example would be a child pausing and asking to use a toy, rather than grabbing it out of a younger sibling’s hand. 
-Working Memory: This is the ability to hold information in your mind and reformat it to make it apply to the task at hand. It is holding onto information long enough to use it. An example would be a child following a two step direction. 
-Emotional Control: This is the ability to regulate our emotions. An example would be a teenager working through feelings of anxiety before taking a test. This can include using strategies such as mindfulness, journaling, or self-talk. 

-Sustained Attention: This is the ability to hold focus and attention throughout a task, despite possible distractions. An example of this would be a child completing an entire page of math homework in one sitting, despite working in the kitchen while parents are making dinner.  

-Task Initiation: The ability to start a task in a timely fashion. An example of this would be a student beginning to study three days before a test, rather than cramming the night before. 

-Planning/Prioritization: This is the ability to plan ahead and to prioritize tasks in terms of importance. An example of this would be a child using an agenda to assist with prioritizing homework each night. 

-Organization: Having systems in place to keep track of things, activities, and information. An example of this would be creating a study space with materials needed for homework in labeled containers. 

-Time management: This is the ability to accurately predict how long something will take, and how to accurately plan according to time. An example of this would be a student who regularly meets deadlines for projects. 

-Goal directed persistence: This is the ability to set a goal and follow through with the steps to meet said goal. An example of this would be a teenager who follows his goal of saving money to buy a video game of his choice at the end of the summer. 

-Flexibility: This is the ability to change or adapt as needed. An example of this would be a child accepting the fact that their schedule for the day was changed with relatively little distress. 

-Metacognition: This is the ability to zoom out and reflect on our own thinking and behavior. An example of this would be a child changing their behavior based on comparing their response to those of others. 



Common Characteristics of Children With EF Difficulties
The above mentioned were examples of children and adolescents who do not have difficulty with executive functions. For those who do, the following behaviors may sound familiar: 
-Reacts immediately, seemingly without “thinking” 

-May need repeated reminders to complete a direction or task

-May have difficulty controlling emotions 

-May become distracted easily, and may need repeated reminders to stay on task

-Procrastinates, often leaving tasks until the last minute

-Often has missing or incomplete assignments, or turns in assignments late 

-Routines such as getting out of the house may always seem like a “fire drill”

-Often loses or misplaces things such as their water bottle, papers and projects 

-Often needs immediate gratification and has difficulty working towards long term goals 

-May react with extreme anger or annoyance when something unexpected comes up and there is a change in plans

-Seems unaware of their behavior, or may have difficulty thinking ahead or thinking through possible options

-May leave things “all over the house” 

-May act surprised when they are told that an assignment is due the next day, even though the teacher has reviewed the assignment repeatedly

Unfortunately and too often, students who struggle with executive function difficulties are thought of as “lazy”, “irresponsible”, or “unmotivated”. The truth is that there is nothing wrong with these students. We as educators and parents need to adjust our teaching styles, environments and tasks to adapt to their complex needs.  

Diagnoses

Before we get into interventions, a quick word about diagnoses. According to the DSM-V (the most recent version of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), executive functioning difficulties do not qualify for a diagnosis on their own. Most often, we see these difficulties among students with a diagnosis of ADHD. Other students with learning differences may also struggle with executive function difficulties, however. If you are concerned that your child is struggling with executive functions, you can speak to school staff members including teachers, counselors, and school psychologists. You can also speak to your pediatrician or a child psychologist about your concerns. 

Interventions

There are A TON of intervention suggestions out there for students who struggle with executive functioning difficulties. The following is certainly not an exhaustive list, but should get you started on the right path. 

-Structure and Routines: For children in general, but especially those with EF difficulties, creating routines makes the environment feel much more predictable, which often makes it easier for a child to navigate. We also want to keep in mind that it is helpful to externalize EF systems, which means creating visuals. This can include a morning and afternoon checklist that is posted somewhere visible. You can also link these routines to a reward system (if, for example, your child has a hard time getting started on homework each night, you could reward them if they start by a certain time). You also want to be consistent in terms of your expectations and use of rewards and consequences. If you give a warning, follow through with it. The predictability helps children regulate.

-Turn the abstract into the concrete: For students with EF difficulties, they often shut down and avoid tasks if there is no end in sight. Help them work through this by making things predictable and breaking them down into bite sized pieces. An example would be helping them break down a long term assignment. Let’s say it’s Monday, and they have a five paragraph essay due Friday. Without assistance, they might wait until Thursday night to write the whole paper. By that point, the task may seem so overwhelming, that they might give up or only partially complete it. If you can help them break it down, the chances of it being completed are much higher. Work with your child to determine what is feasible. Look at a calendar and work backwards: “Okay, we have four nights to complete this. Do you think you could write the intro and one paragraph Monday? How about paragraphs two and three Tuesday? Can you write paragraphs four and five Wednesday, and proofread Thursday?” You are putting an end in sight, thereby making it much easier to tackle. 

-Use a planner: Similar to the above mentioned suggestion, emphasize to your child the importance of using a planner. You can also model planning and prioritizing by explaining to your child how you balance everything you need to do. 

-Externalize the systems: Use visuals! Students with executive functioning difficulties often rely on visuals, checklists, signs and post it notes to get things done. Make these checklists highly visible- place them on the mirror in the bathroom or on the fridge. Consider getting a monthly calendar to put on the fridge to keep track of after school activities and big due dates, including projects, tests and quizzes.

-Use a timer: Try to use a kitchen or digital timer rather than one on your phone. You can chunk tasks by time, use a timer to provide built in breaks, and help children more accurately predict how long something will take. You can ask how long they think an assignment will take, set the timer for that amount of time, and check in when it goes off to see where they are. Over time, it helps children make more accurate predictions. 

-Mindset, Mindfulness and Self-Compassion: These each deserve their own articles, but for now, a brief introduction: Having a growth mindset- We want our children to know that we can change our habits and abilities through effort, problem solving, considering other options, and persevering. We want to begin to praise our children for the little steps they are making along the way, rather than only focusing on the end goal. Carol Dweck is a fantastic resource on growth mindset.

I personally can’t say enough about mindfulness and how it has changed my life. There is plenty of research on the benefits, but in terms of executive functioning, it can especially help with improving focus, emotional regulation and metacognition. You can model mindfulness in day to day activities as simple as washing the dishes, by focusing on what it feels like, sounds like, looks like. You would basically describe such a thing to your child and ask if they can do the same with an activity- use all five senses to focus on it. Mindfulness is about being fully present and accepting the moment as it is. I also really enjoy the apps Calm, and Stop, Breathe and Think. The latter is a meditation app that is great for adults and adolescents, and also has a version for younger children. 

You can model self-compassion by talking about your faults and failures, and telling your child how you worked through them. We as humans all experience disappointment and failure, so how can we turn that into a positive? We can teach our children to view failure as an opportunity for growth and change. We can also model this by speaking to ourselves with the same kindness and love that we would show an elderly parent, or our children. Kristin Neff is a great resource on self-compassion, and Jessica Lahey is an expert on the topic of failure. 

-Emotional Regulation: If your child is clearly upset, sometimes it is helpful if we label and validate the emotion. This also allows us to teach and model problem solving and emotional regulation. For example, if you notice that your child appears anxious, you might say, “It looks like you might be feeling anxious. One strategy I have used to work through these feelings is deep breathing.” Then, in that moment, you can co-regulate with your child by putting one hand on your chest, and actually taking a deep and mindful breath. 

If your child is becoming stressed when you ask them if their homework is done, or whether or not they turned something in, make that conversation predictable for them. For example, you might say, “Every day when you get home from school, I will ask you these questions. The conversation will last 10 minutes.” That way, the child knows what to expect and can be prepared for that conversation, rather than overwhelmed by it. 

As often as possible, when giving your child a directive, allow for reasonable choices and options. Involve the child in the problem solving process. This allows for the transfer of ownership and independence. If children and adolescents are feeling emotionally overwhelmed, they will often shut down. Before we give directives or ask them to do something, we want to make sure that they are feeling emotionally well. 

When listening to our children, consider pausing before responding. So often, we spend time thinking about our reaction when someone is speaking to us rather than holding space for them and being fully present to listen. This can have a profound impact on your child becoming more comfortable sharing with you.

We also want to pay attention to the amount of praise we give our children. We should aim for a 3:1 positive to negative ratio. It is often very easy to notice and point out the negative, but we want to get into the habit of “catching the good”, or providing praise three times as much as we are pointing out what has gone wrong. 

I congratulate you for getting to the end of this article! You are now on the path to helping your child become more independent and regulated. Know that change is an incredibly complex process that takes time and patience. Pick and choose a few strategies, and add as you go. Pay attention to and celebrate the small successes along the way. 

If you are interested in learning more about individualized executive function coaching services, contact us here.

Additional Resources 

Dr. Russell Barkley is a leading researcher in the field of ADHD. The following video gives great insight into what it can be like to have ADHD. 




The TiLT Parenting Podcast focuses on issues related to nueroatypical kids, and includes interviews with many leaders in their respective fields.

Seth Perler- EF coach in Colorado who is featured in the above mentioned podcast.  

Daring Greatly by BrenĂ© Brown 

Mindfulness apps: Stop, Think and Breathe; Calm








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